• If you practice a formal religion there are often specific rituals that relate to death, funerals, and anniversaries.

• If you don’t, you can create your own rituals to mark special events and anniversaries.

• They can involve the whole family or be something you do just for yourself.

• Rituals can be one-off or they can be carried out every year or on certain dates or events.

Some ideas include:

Candle lighting

• Lighting a candle and saying a special prayer or reading something is a powerful way to remember.

Planting a tree

• Some families choose a special place to plant a flower, shrub or tree. You can then visit it, decorate it or pick the flowers on anniversaries and other events that you would want to have shared with your parent.

Releasing balloons

• You can buy helium balloons to release on birthdays or anniversaries. Some people write messages or attach photos to them.

Sharing a special meal

• This could be about cooking and eating dishes that have a connection to your parent or just about getting together and sharing stories and memories of them while having a meal. Going to a favourite restaurant is another way to create a ritual.

Create a special walk

• There may be places that you used to go with your parent. If these places are in and around where you still live, you could create a walk that takes them all in and even light a candle or release a balloon at spots along the way. If you no longer live in the same area you could make a special trip back there.

Online memorial

• There are a number of websites that allow you to create an online memorial. You can post photos, write tributes and/or write about their life. It can be updated and may be especially helpful on anniversaries and other special dates. The Living Years is one such website, and is free for 12 months for Now What members.

There's also a tribute page in the forums on this website where you can post something.

Pamper yourself

• Being nice to yourself on those days that may be hard is another way of creating a ritual. It could be having a massage, going to a movie, buying a new piece of clothing, CD or ornament.

Piercings and tattoos

• Some people choose to get piercings or memorial tattoos done in a place that is not too visible as a permanent reminder of their parent. (Be aware that it is against the law for people under 18 to get a tattoo, even if you get a parent’s permission.)

Remember: You can create a ritual around any activity. It is about doing something that honours the memory of the person who has died, has significance for you and helps maintain a connection to them.