Just before Christmas 2010, my mum went into hospital to have an operation. When the surgeon opened up her stomach they found a big mass of cancer in various areas of her stomach, ovaries and bowels. They couldn't proceed with the operation and immediately closed her back up. The next morning they told her the devastating news which broke my heart and hurt the whole family.    

Her whole life my mum has been such a generous, kind person who has helped many people including me. Shes been so brave by bringing a child up on her own and having to cope with everything. 

"We eventually found out the cancer was grade 3"

and was pretty serious. Everyone was telling me things will be fine and i shouldn't worry but i coped with it in my own way, trying to deal with exams coming up at school and being strong for my mum. She started having chemotherapy which made a few sections of her hair fall out, but instead she shaved it off and has been so brave ever since to go around wearing no wig or bandanna.  

I respect my mum in every way possible and I generally think she is the bravest woman I have ever met or known. 

As the weeks passed, The nurses and doctors realized my mums tumor wasn't shrinking as much as it should be and wasn't getting better, but it wasn't getting worse. This was even more heartbreaking, nut my mum and I coped and kept strong. 

"Some of my friends say they're always there"

but when it comes to it, only an 8th of them will actually listen or will actually care. My family are hard to talk to because I feel they are judgmental. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep thinking of what would happen if, but I never lose hope in my mum because shes the only person I have left and I couldn't ask for a better mum. For the family it was obviously devastating but for me it was a different type of hurt, knowing that I could lose her and because shes my mum, its hard to keep strong all the time.

"I write stories on my laptop sometimes"

about how I feel or write them on a piece of paper and rip them up and get rid of them, but it doesn't help. I love my mum so much and I would do anything for her to not be in pain anymore. 

I couldn't ask for anything else but for her to get better and she can live to see my grow up and take after her. I love you mum and I always will xx