My relationships changed
He has had three massive operations since and after each has lost over 15kg of weight and barely survived, but at the moment he is coping okay.
Then in 2011, my dad was told he had fairly severe adenocarcinoma in the right side of his face and neck.
Adenocarcinoma is rarely found here (it's usually found in the lungs and bowels - from what I have been told/read), so his case was reasonably difficult to diagnose and select treatment for. He had an operation to remove all of the visible cancer which ended up involving taking out 57 lymph nodes, which when tested, all had cancer properties.
At the moment he is going through radiotherapy and in January/February will start chemotherapy for 3 months.
So in terms of relationships: first off there are the relationships I have with my family. I have become far closer to my little brother, who is 11 years old, and my parents, but in a different way. We spend a lot more time together as my dad isn't in a good enough state to work and my mum had also stopped working.
My little brother is coping a little differently, he has become 10 times more possessive of me and doesn't like it when I go out with my friends or spend more time with my mum or dad than he does with me. It's not his fault and he can't help it but sometimes it is so difficult to listen to his whinging and I just crack it at him. So on the other hand, cancer has also stretched some aspects of family relationships.
Then there are the relationships with my friends.
It is so much more complicated than it seems, to keep acting natural when inside you are so upset and angry and frustrated. I don't show it or tell anybody how I feel because I don't want to be an attention seeker. My friends don't really understand either and always confide in me about their boy troubles and their issues which seem so minor compared to mine.
Finally, there are boys.
They seem to have disappeared of my radar, every boy I like screws me over and right now, I am just over it. I'm not allowed to go out as much anymore and I always feel like i'm missing out. My friends all go to parties, gatherings and catch ups while I stay at home helping look after my dad or escorting him to the hospital for appointments and treatment. Of course I'm not complaining because it's not my dad's fault he has cancer, it's just that I get very jealous that all my friends are out and about having so much fun while i'm in the worst state of mind ever.
To whoever's reading, thank you, I needed to vent my feelings.